Totally gutted to be writing this but it's time to admit that I am currently in the depths of a horrible relapse. I guess one was to be expected but it's never easy when it hits.
And this one has brought with it new symptoms. Bleugh!
Basically my right arm, you know the one that I need for EVERYTHING, while still functioning, is painful and has this hard-to-describe dead-arm feeling.
And I know half of that makes hardly any sense but I'm putting that down to the equally horrible steroids that I've had to submit to - to try and fight off this bad boy before it has my arm totally useless.
Steroids are never good. Well, they are in that they are supposed to help kick the ass out of a relapse, but their side effects are notorious - hence the reluctance on my part to start taking them.
But, I'm nothing if not a pragmatist, and if the neurologist and my MS nurse says they're worth giving a go, then so be it.
Today is day two and I've been awake since 5.30am and in constant pain since the minute I woke up.
Sympathy is appreciated at this juncture, but, genuinely not necessary because, honestly, it's the sort of pain you get used to.
And I'm thinking that if it continues then that can only mean that it improves my pain threshold - and surely that means my next child birthing experience will be a breeze!
You see, ever the optimist.
Of course, they're also known for their ability to make you permanently starving, so I've all my nearest and dearest warned that I am NOT to eat everything in sight over the next 12 days. Pity I've written this while scoffing chocolates ... but I'm sick, so they're allowed, yes?!
And some of my Twitter friends with MS have warned me that they also induce a state of insomnia - a condition I suffered from while pregnant and which I would very much like to avoid because a mum with no sleep does not a good mummy make!
Finally, I'm all booked to go to London next week for gloriously girlie weekend, which I most definitely will not be missing. Under. Any. Circumstances.
There's nothing else for it. I will rest from now until then and let the steroids do their best work.
Wish me luck.
I have the same love/hate relationship with steroids. Hang in there. And you must make it to London. You deserve it!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Jodi, it's reassuring to know i'm not alone! And I will make it, by hook or by crook :)
ReplyDeleteoh man... i hope you start feeling better soon! sucks to travel while ill... although, are we ill? i choose not think of this as being ill or sick... more a sort of unfortunate glitch ha!
ReplyDeletei've never had steroids.... eek
and i am with you on the pain thing... sort of adjust to it so that it's ever present but not the first thought of every second of every day....
Hello love,
ReplyDelete'Sympathy' given although I do know NOT needed! Great blog - albeit a shitty one today but as always couched in that wonderful lioness attitude of yours. Take care and ride this effer out! Love to you as always, xxDiane
PS: This is my third time to try and post something - I always screw up with the 'select a profile' bit...here I go again! x OK I have selected Anonymous until I can get to grips with this but you know who I am.... :)